Final Summary/Reactions

After privately asking 5 individuals I know have divorced or separated families, I was surprised with the amount of various responses I received on the questions I asked. For example, one question was if they thought a change that occurred after the split benefited or damaged their family. The response shows 40% benefited and 60% put both. These results show how not every divorce had a positive outcome to all families.

On a whole, I'm really glad I chose this topic since I can relate to it so well. I have a lot of compassion for children who are experiencing the same hardships, I hope you tell by my presentation how truly interested I was researching about Marriage and Family and the effects of divorce.

Revised Summary/Plan 4/14

I have shared my google doc so far with about 5 people who I know have divorced parents. The feedback i've been getting shows that most families have had a civil divorce and that they think their family has benefited from the change. Some people said they understand why their parents got divorced and are ok with it. Coming from a divorced parent family myself, seeing this information about how people haven't had that hard of a time going through a divorce makes me pleased. I'm glad this has helped the families rather than cause a harsher outcome. More people will be getting my survey so there will be more information and statistics to come! 

Strategy/Plan for Research

My plan is to create a survey and send it mainly to teenagers with divorced or separated parents. There will be about 10-15 questions. These questions will help figure out the effects of divorce throughout the families. For example, one questions might ask if the divorce was mutual or civil between the parents. I will not be making my survey public but rather sending it privately to a group of teenagers who I am aware have divorced parents. I'm interested in learning the effects of going through a major family change such as divorce in upper middle class families. 

Suggested Research Message

As a child from divorced parents, this topic was obviously easy for me to relate to. My plan is to develop  a survey to see how many typical upper middle class families have divorced or separated parents and the general consensus of the effects it has on members of the family involved. I will be asking a series of questions if there parents are divorced, how they feel about it, and if it benefited their family or not. I will be giving teenagers this survey ranging from the ages of 13-18. 

#8: Summary of Research

After researching the many articles and videos for this topic I found a lot of new perspectives on divorce. Knowing there are new outlets for kids and parents to confront this weird change is comforting to me. I myself am going through a similar situation with my family right now and I found many of the things I looked up to be very helpful. Divorce has become a regular thing in society, its nice to know social media is becoming accepting of it. I think researching this has helped me become okay with divorce and the change that comes with it because it's for the better. Change might be scary at first but could have a better outcome for all. It was important for me to research this topic because it gave me a better perspective on divorce and what comes with it. 

#7- Kids Talk About marriage and Divorce

I found this video while scrolling through the internet and thought it was so interesting because its just kids sitting down talking about how they feel about marriage and divorce. No influence from parents just them being honest about their parents and their different situations. One girl talks about her parents and what marriage means to her, she says the key is to be "true to one another" which I thought was so sweet and inspirational. Another girl talks about her Mom who was remarried, she expresses how she sometimes feels its her fault that her parents don't get along even though she knows that's not really true. I can relate, my parents are going through a divorce and its hard even for me not to feel responsible for whats happening and i'm 18 years old. 

VIEW VIDEO HERE!!!! :)

#6-The Grounds to Divorce

In New Jersey there are nine reasons that you can divorce someone. I find some of these grounds very interesting. For example, you can divorce someone if  your spouse was sentenced to go to jail for 18 or more consecutive months after marriage. Another one is you can divorce someone if they have a drug or alcohol problem. Some of these are very helpful to people who live with am abusive husband or wife and could probably speed up the divorce trial knowing what the exact problem is. 

Click here to view all 9 grounds

#5- CHOICE: Catholics and Divorce

Being a Roman Catholic I couldn't help but wonder the church's rules on divorce.

I googled "the Roman Catholic's take on divorce" and a faq page came up with many frequently asked questions. As I started reading on how annulments were granted I figured out its a long and complex system.  I also found out the church charges a fee to grant an annulment! To me it seems odd to charge $400 just to be remarried in the church again. I feel like it decreases the meaning of marriage by putting a price on it. Especially if the annulment isn't even granted! Another thing I do not agree with is that the church does not view your marriage as "real" if you do not have it performed by a priest or deacon. You are also not allowed to receive communion. To me, marriage is about love not who performed the ceremony, it seems ridiculous to prevent someone from receiving the Eucharist because of it. http://www.dmdiocese.org/divorced-and-catholic-faqs.cfm

#4 CHOICE: Helping Children Get Through Divorce

So I realized my last two post about divorce mostly talk about statistics rather than what divorce really does to families. It got me thinking about the kids especially and how parents handle breaking the news to the kids. So I went on google and searched "How to explain divorce to kids" and since in our previous class we spoke about Seasame Street I figured this video was perfect to use. 

The fact that Seasame Street has spoke about divorce in their show truly shows how relevant divorce has become in our society. I'm happy they addressed it in an episode, I think its important for kids to know its not weird or embarrassing to have divorced parents, they shouldn't feel like outsiders because their family may not be like everyone else's. 

#3 Video Divorce Rates

VIDEO

This video addresses the divorce rates in the US and the new "norms" couples are now doing while dating. The national survey of family and growth states in the video that 50% of marriages still end in divorce and have been for over 2 decades. It also mentions that couples are now moving in together before marriage. Statistics also show that living together before "taking the plunge" has prevented more divorces and led to more successful marriages. I personally think that living together before marriage helps you to better know the person you're potentially marrying. Although in some cultures and religions it's usually prohibited. I feel you get a better perspective on what marriage will be like with your partner.  

Divorce After 50 Grows More Common

http://www.nytimes.com/2013/09/22/fashion/weddings/divorce-after-50-grows-more-common.html?_r=0


This article talks about the growing number of older Americans who have divorced lately, and the serious implications it has on society. A teacher, Stephanie Coontz, who teaches family history at Evergreen State College mentions that married couples aren't staying together because people expect more of marriage than they used to. She also mentions that in the present day we have many more options available if marriage doesn't "live up to those expectations." Since 2011 the census bureau calculated about 15.4 percent of Americans older than 50 were divorced. 

Reading this article I was shocked to learn that a large amount of older couples were divorcing. I always assumed that if you were with someone for that long they were happy enough to stay together till death, as they say in their marriage vows. I do agree with Coontz's point of how nowadays more options for single people are available. I think that divorce does have a strain on the economy because it places a burden on children, and also on institutional support from government and other sources. 

#1 Introduction

My reason for choosing the topic of divorce is to understand more about it since my family is going through a similar situation. I also find it interesting to learn how its recently become a more common choice for families in America.